Ladies Line

Onli Ladis Plis

Onli Ladis Plis

The best thing to have happened to Delhi since Sarojini Nagar, Lajpat Nagar, Janpath and the likes is definitely the Metro. And the best thing to have happened to Delhi since the Metro is the much revered and envied Ladies compartment.

For the uninitiated, the first compartment in the onward direction of every train is reserved for ladies. Apart from the obvious benefits of the move for women, men are in a way benefited too. Now they know exactly where to slyly fixate their wandering eyes.

Being the privileged member of this inner circle of first compartment, I’ve chalked out 10 categories of women who frequent the hallowed premises; for those who aren’t satisfied with observing from the sidelines.

1. Loud Talkers (Phone or otherwise)

"I'm telling this *only* to you."

“I’m telling this *only* to you.”

It’s no secret that women love to talk. But imagine the plight of others when it is at volumes hard to ignore. I’ve unwittingly been party to conversations ranging from relationship woes and in-law bitching to career advises being dispensed and shopping lists being exchanged.

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2. Bling Brigade

The word subtle ain't in my dictionary.

The word subtle ain’t in my dictionary.

A category that’s easy to come by and hard to miss. Delhi being Delhi, women love to dress up. Can you imagine the horror of the local grocer discovering your non-kohled eyes or un-painted lips? *shudders*. Look around the metro any time of the day and you’d find women from all age groups in the most garish and lurid of outfits, complemented by gaudy make-up and blingy accessories. These women surely must be the stars (literally!) of someone’s universe.

3. Goggled Girls

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This particular phenomenon must probably be as old as the sun itself but still baffles the daylights out of me. Now I understand you’d like to protect your kohl-lined, mascara replete eyes from the bright glares of the sun, but what I don’t get is why keep ’em on when there’s no sun? This category of women heroically keep their sun glasses perched up on their noses even when the metro’s running underground. Maybe it’d take a few years of scientific study to get to the bottom of this mystery.

Oh you must!

Oh you must!

4. Rule Breakers

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Being an Indian automatically grants you the license to break rules. Hell yeah! We’re risk takers that way. No wonder then, that this category (which belongs to all socio-economic classes of society) takes utmost pleasure in sitting on the floor and munching snacks from their carefully packed ‘dabbas’, when announcements to the very effect are being made every 5 minutes. It’s damn cool you know!

5. Scooch Requesters

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Anybody who’s travelled in the ladies compartment even once in her life would tell you about its unsaid rule. Have even an inch of space between you and the person beside? Well you gotta scooch for anybody who asks for it, no questions asked.

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And the worst is when a female who, well to put it delicately, would never fit into the tiny space, requests you to do so and ends up hogging all of it leaving you gasping for air or your former seat. I once had to endure an experience of a scooch requester’s half thigh resting on mine. Oh the horror!

6. Stareres

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Without a doubt women check out other women more than men do. And metro isn’t any different. You’re sometimes at the receiving and sometimes at the giving end of it.

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But there are women who’ve made it their business to unflinchingly stare at every female who travels with them. And the professionals that they are, they remain unfazed even when you catch them in the act.

7. Music Lovers

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Music is a good thing, maybe the best of things. But what happens when you have Justin Bieber or his Bollywood equivalent Atif Aslam blaring from the headphones of the person sitting next to you? Not the best of situations is it? And then there are those who rock their heads and lip-sync to whatever song they’re listening to. Well, music makes you do stupid things.

8. Bookworms

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Whenever you spot a female intently staring into a book in her hands and her mouth bunched up, you know you’ve come across a bookworm. Whether she’s standing in the crowded lanes hanging on to her dear life or sitting on the luckily found (grabbed?) seat, she’d not lose sight of her knowledge reservoir even for a second. Time well spent won’t you say?

9. Cool Crusaders

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There’s a reason why shady institutes which loudly claim “ek mahine mein angrezi speakna seekhiye” (learn to speak English in one month), have mushroomed across the country. Because talking in English is just so cool. Can’t get your work done? Shout in English. Want to clear an interview? English silly!

Students of Lady Shri Ram College for Woman in New Delhi

This category of women (mostly college girls) make sure they shout at the top of their voices in totally accented English with the words ‘dude’ and ‘like’ thrown in after every second word. Oh it’s not like they want to, they HAVE to. How else would you know they’re from the cool breed?

10. Sleepers

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The oldest and the most famous category in the world of trains. The moment they get onto any kind of moving vehicle, a fog of drowsiness encircles them and they quietly submit to its incessant clamour.

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This category is the worst enemy of the ‘scooch requesters’ and some even feign sleep to belong to this category as soon as they comfortably settle in their hard-earned seats.

So which category do you belong to?

In case I’ve missed any, please add it in the comments section.

Movie Review – Ladies vs. Ricky Bahl (2011)

Year of Release: 2011

Stars: Ranveer Singh, Anushka Sharma, Parineeta Chopra, Aditi Sharma, Dippanita Sharma

Verdict: 2.5/5

What do you get when you use the old ingredients to prepare a seemingly new dish? A dish that you think is innovative but the customers don’t. This is what has happened with Ladies vs. Ricky Bahl. You walk into the movie theatre expecting the spiciness & aroma of Band Baaja Baarat but instead get served a dish that is presented attractively but lacks that zing. None the less, the dish is definitely edible & quite palatable too.

This is the story of a con-man Ricky Bahl, who uses his charm, good looks & flawless impersonification of different characters to con attractive women. His fiendishly clever planning & execution always guarantee him a win, at least until the girl power decides to get the better of him.

Among the plethora of cons in his kitty we are shown three – 1. On a rich & gullible Delhi babe (Parineeta Chopra) as a gym trainer, 2. On a Mumbai lass (Dippanita Sharma) as an artist & 3. On a Lucknowi lady (Aditi Sharma) as a cloth merchant. These 3 distressed damsels are united by the media (thanks to channels like India TV who have nothing better to cover than topics like – the spot where cows commit suicide or apne bacchon ko chikni chameli se bachaayein) and decide to con the con-guru (or Bloody Kameena as they call him) himself. And just when you started wondering that you missed spotting Anushka all this while in the movie due to her excessive weight loss, she suddenly graces the screen with all her Jazba. As a salesgirl, she uses all her acting prowess to sell stuff to innocent shoppers. She is so good that anybody who she tries selling to, doesn’t leave empty-handed from the store. Given her innate talent, the 3 girls design a plan and decide to use her to get their money back from bloody kameena.

Although the schemes and plots used in the movie to con & fool women are clever, but what is unfathomable is that these otherwise daring & clever women trust him so easily with so much money and fall for the cheap tricks. It almost seems as if everything is ready in each sub-plot and the red carpet is rolled out for Ricky to come and conveniently con the ladies. But then if logic ain’t your thing then this makes for a nice weekend time-pass masala movie.

All the actors are good but Parineeta as the spoilt Delhi bimbette Dimple, outrightly steals the show. Her portrayal of a typical dumb, spoilt Delhi girl is absolutely spot on; including the accent, mannerisms & dressing sense. She lends that funny, light-hearted, innocent comic feel to the movie.

There is very little of Anushka (quite literally too) in the movie. Also the chemistry between the lead pair isn’t as sizzling as it was in Band Baaja Baarat. The director has definitely tried to capitalize on BBB’s success as evident from the last scene of the movie but it just isn’t the same.

Definitely an entertaining watch for the weekend but nowhere near the magic of Band Baaja Baarat.

Trivia:

  • IMDB Rating – 8.1/10
  • In a scene, Anushka is shown riding her scooter. It was in fact very ably executed by the direction team on what is a stationary scooter – where assistants are standing behind the scooter and pushing it to make it seem like Anushka is riding it.
  • During one of the shoots, a man arrived disguised as the late MF Hussain to attract Anushka’s attention. The real artist was a huge fan of the actor.
  • While shooting a scooter sequence, the bike skidded on gravel and fell on Ranveer. His foot was burned in the mishap. A doctor tended to him and Ranveer, being a true professional, continued to shoot to ensure that the schedule was not delayed.
  • A very pretty brunette was supposed to get on a jet ski with Ranveer for a shot, but she refused to do it out of fear – she was afraid of falling off the skis. Ranveer charmed her, and convinced her to get on, promising that he would ensure that she didn’t fall off. True to his word, he rode the jet ski with utmost care and caution, but the pretty brunette still fell off and poor Ranveer had to convince her to do the shot all over again. The second time around, all went well.
  • While shooting in Lucknow, Aditi slipped on a pile ofjamun fruits and even tore her costume. Ranveer tended to her and made sure she was perfectly okay before they started shooting again.
  • While shooting in Goa, director Maneesh showed Ranveer how to ride a bike. Ranveer proved to be a good student and confidently rode the bike for the film.
  • On the final day of the Goa shoot, the cast and crew decided to celebrate the wrap by organising a fun raffle. The raffle proved profitable for crew driver Edwin, who won a cash prize of Rs 5000, which was gifted to him by Ranveer and Anushka.
  • Ricky Bahl’s multiple unshaven and shaved looks in the film kept the cast and crew waiting for days to shoot – especially the looks that required the right amount of facial hair to appear.
  • Ranveer went on a strict 48 hours diet regime and stayed hungry for nearly two days to get the perfect six pack ab look.
  • During one of the shots on the jet-ski, a big wave hit Ranveer and Anushka and flung them in different directions in the middle of the sea. Yet both of them braved 20-foot waves, despite the jet-ski being capsized and gave the perfect shot.
  • While shooting in Lucknow, the entire Imambara area had to be cordoned off. Massive crowds appeared to watch Ranveer Singh shoot and kept calling him “Bitoo! Bitoo aa gayaa!” Rambo was a clear favourite and worked the crowd very well by obliging fans with waves, hugs and pictures! After pack up, the entire cast feasted at Lucknow’s famous “Tunda Kababi.”
  • Maneesh Sharma, the director of the film, decided to add boats against the beach in one of the shots to make it more interesting – this last minute addition made for a perfect shot and the boats became an integral part of a decisive scene in the movie that involves the entire cast.
  • The cast and crew’s favourite hangout joint in Goa was Cape Town Cafe located in Baga, North Goa. When not at the café they binged on mangoes and seafood especially prawn curry (which they had nearly every day)!
  • Ranveer is a big cricket fan and an even bigger fan of Dhoni. A few years ago Dhoni had shot with Shaad Ali on an ad (on which Ranveer had helped) and Ranveer and Dhoni hit it off really well ever since. While shooting in Delhi (just post India’s World Cup win) Ranveer heard Captain Dhoni was in town with his wife and invited him to come over to the hotel. They hung out all night and bonded over food and films and cricket. The entire crew joined the fun party!
  • Ladies Vs Ricky Bahl is reportedly inspired from the Marathi play To Mee Navhech(1968), which in turn has inspired a couple of  Tamil and Kannada films.
  • Parineeti Chopra, who makes her debut in LVRB, is Priyanka Chopra’s cousin.
  • Ricky Bahl’s caller tone in the movie is the famous dialogue from Shah Rukh Khan‘s Baazigar,”Haar kar jeetne waalon ko baazigar kehte hai.” In fact, Ranveer even mentions Shah Rukh towards the end of the film.

Movie Review – Delhi Belly (2011)

Shit Happens

F****N AWESOME!!

However crass the above words are, they truly and aptly sum up the reaction after watching the movie. With this movie Bollywood has truly come of age and it totally kicks ass.

And ‘ass’ is exactly what the movie starts with giving you a flavor of what is about to be thrown at you.

Let’s quickly get over with the story as that isn’t the most extraordinary thing about this movie. The movie is about 3 flatmates – Tashi (Imraan Khan), Arun (Vir Das), Nitin (Kunal Roy Kapoor) who accidently get embroiled in a diamond smuggling ring. Tashi’s girlfriend (Shehnaaz Treasurywala) unknowingly acts as a courier to deliver diamonds for Vijay Raaz. She gives the package to Tashi to deliver to an address  who the gives it to Nitin and who in turn gives two packages to Arun and they get mixed up and the wrong one reaches Vijay Raaz. And then the story takes a wild turn.

Now the story isn’t anything exceptional, it’s the treatment that makes the movie stand out. The movie is one of a kind that has come in a really long time. The English version is mostly in English and portrays how normal youngsters talk these days in big cities like Mumbai & Delhi. If the movie wasn’t treated delicately, then the fine balance between cheapness & crass humor could’ve been lost.

All the actors are aptly casted and even the smallest character has done his/her bit and make the movie a perfect watch.The director has paid attention to even the smallest details like the Haryanvi accent of the sidekicks. The Potty humor, the background music, the language, the character sketches, the look of the characters everything works for the movie and only an Amir Khan could have pulled it off.

The movie might not sit well with people with a more conservative sense of humor. Though the opening revenue of the film suggests otherwise.

It is DEFINITELY a must watch, even if you watch it for the sheer joy of watching something out of the league than the regular bollywood potboilers.

Shit did happen in this movie but we ain’t complaining…I say go for it!

Trivia:

  • IMDB Rating – 8.6/10
  • Shooting for the film began in August 2008 in Delhi. But due to many technical reasons, the film finally got released after three years in July 2011.
  • Imran Khan gave four screen test and then he finally got chosen for the role in his uncle Aamir Khan‘s movie ‘Delhi Belly‘.
  • For an item girl in the film, earlier the makers were thinking for Katrina Kaif, Deepika Padukone and Malaika Arora Khan. But finally they chosen MTV VJ Anusha Dandekar.
  • To bring in good luck for his approaching home production ‘Delhi Belly’, Aamir has made up his mind to wear the same blue T-shirt which he had donned on the World Cup 2011 finals, on the release date of the film.
  • Writer of the film Akshat Verma especially come down from Los Angles to Mumbai to meet Aamir. While Aamir was busy with some shoot so Akshat gave the script to the maid of Aamir’s house. By a strange quirk of fate, Kiran Rao read the script first. There was a pile of 200 scripts next to Aamir and Kiran picked up the first one and started reading. She started laughing and her laughter increased that she fell from the sofa. Aamir asked her what she was reading. She said that its Delhi Belly.
  • Bhag D.K. Bose Aandhi Aayi, the song that has become a raging hit, was included in the film at the last moment and was composed just a few weeks ago, much after the principal shooting of the film was over.
  • To ensure that his prime protagonists got the plot, language, setting and milieu just right, Aamir and director Abhinay Deo come up with a 100-hour-long crash course. It was a 10-day-long crash course, and all actors holed up in a room for up to 10 hours at a stretch along with the producer and director. The focus on these meetings was on ensuring the trio of actors got their gaalis right, and react naturally to the adult humour.